Love and Hate
I am having a love-hate relationship with my computer. Nothing can aggravate me more, pull my wires, like a fickle and seemingly-unfixable computer. Be it the internet or some other network, maybe it’s the CPU or a virus or maybe the antivirus software. Perhaps it’s an LCD that won’t project or a printer that won’t align. The conversation goes like this….
“Give me a document”, I command.
“Um, I didn’t hear the magic word, Melissa”
“Give me a document” I repeat.
(No response)
“Give me Give me GIVE ME a document!”
“I’m ignoring you now”
With some gentle stroking, “May I please have my document?”
“I’m thinking about it.”
“Okay, well what about THIS document?”
“Sorry, which one did you want again?”
“…or even THIS one. Or just open THIS program! JUST SHOW ME THAT YOU’RE ALIVE! SHOW ME YOU’RE LISTENING TO ME.”
“Now I’m all confused. I’m not sure what you want me to do. STOP HITTING MY BUTTONS.”
“Stupid computer!”
I am having a love-hate relationship with my computer. Nothing can aggravate me more, pull my wires, like a fickle and seemingly-unfixable computer. Be it the internet or some other network, maybe it’s the CPU or a virus or maybe the antivirus software. Perhaps it’s an LCD that won’t project or a printer that won’t align. The conversation goes like this….
“Give me a document”, I command.
“Um, I didn’t hear the magic word, Melissa”
“Give me a document” I repeat.
(No response)
“Give me Give me GIVE ME a document!”
“I’m ignoring you now”
With some gentle stroking, “May I please have my document?”
“I’m thinking about it.”
“Okay, well what about THIS document?”
“Sorry, which one did you want again?”
“…or even THIS one. Or just open THIS program! JUST SHOW ME THAT YOU’RE ALIVE! SHOW ME YOU’RE LISTENING TO ME.”
“Now I’m all confused. I’m not sure what you want me to do. STOP HITTING MY BUTTONS.”
“Stupid computer!”
“Just following protocol, dumb-ass”
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