Melissa's Place

Epilation Abuse

There is a divey little hair salon in a plaza near work. If you pay cash, there’s no taxes charged and an eyebrow was is only $7. That’s unheard of. You walk in and there’s hair all over the floor and the owner, a bit of a tubby man in an unbuttoned smock, is eating a plate full of grapes and watermelon and feeding them to a woman with her head under a conical hair drying machine. No one speaks English very fluently there. But they wax my eyebrows in a way that makes me feel like I’ve had a face lift.

I’ve been to other places that charge more for eyebrows, but I haven’t liked the shape they’ve left me with. It just wasn’t me. So I’ve reluctantly waited until I’ve had some cash and enough spare time to let the swelling go down afterwards, and I went to get my eyebrows done at the divey little salon. The woman is possibly Vietnamese. She speaks curtly and I don’t understand most of what she says. She is not a conversationalist anyway. She is a get-down-to-business kind of a girl. “You want eyebrow?” she’ll confirm. She’ll point to what looks like an examination table in a little room at the back of the salon, where I’ll lie down. Her technique is painful. She’ll wax, and I can handle that. But she’ll pluck and pluck and pluck and pluck. It actually occurred to me yesterday that maybe she was removing my entire eyebrows. And if I wince she’ll say, “You have lot eyebrow!” as if it’s my fault.

I can handle that kind of abuse for a virtual face lift (I’ve proven that by returning time and time again). However, the most striking blow to my pride is that EVERY SINGLE TIME I go for an eyebrow wax, she’ll point to my upper lip and say, “What about lip?” I have a few stray hairs, yes, but my dignity is hurt! I will jut out my chin and say, “No! Eyebrows only please.” If I wanted my upper lip waxed, wouldn’t I have asked? I am insulted! Absolutely ridiculously appalled that she thinks that this technique will work! This technique of suggesting that some part of a woman is hairier than is socially acceptable when you’ve got them in the shop for some other reason. CRAZY WOMAN! I think to myself.

Then I begin to contemplate. Why did I start getting my eyebrows waxed? What made me come here in the first place? And I recall a trip I made to this very shop four years ago to have my hair highlighted for Hilary’s wedding. I remember being very, very pleased with the hair styling and all that, but very hurt when she asked me, “What about eyebrow?”