The Perfect Man and his two teeny flaws
I have a co-worker and friend, whom I will give the pseudonym Nej. And she has a husband, Dahc, who is the topic of many conversations when Nej and I go running together. Of course, Kram is equally a topic of conversation at these times, but today, it happened to be Dahc we talked about. And she divulged a few secrets (it’s okay, Dahc, breathe) that were comforting to say the least.
(Now, don’t worry Dahc, I have cleverly disguised your identity so as to protect your privacy.)
Why were these secrets comforting? Well, there’s a rumour going around that Dahc is a perfect husband. Yes, Nej will be the first to admit that she is often astounded to have won such a superb prize of a mate. Not only is he a lean-mean running machine, he’s a great father and has a very sensible grasp of finances (good thing, because he’s an accountant) and Nej appreciates all these things. However, today I learned two (I hesitate to call them flaws) imperfections that just make him wonderful in that Ikea-As-Is sort of way. Flaw #1: Dahc does not love doing laundry. Apparently he sometimes forgets which settings to use on the washing machine (a difficulty I’m sure we’ve all faced from time to time). Flaw #2: He’s very good at ironing. Ah ha! I know what you’re thinking. But it IS a flaw, and he will realize that next time I have a pile of wrinkly shirts and he discovers them in his basement on the ironing board, waiting quietly and patiently for his skilled hands.
The aforementioned Flaw#2 has, in fact, gotten him into some hot water at one point many years ago (at the tender young age of 23 – how can any of us be judged for what we did at 23?). It was during a busy time in the Nej-Dahc household. And Nej thought to herself (she was also very young and idealistic and energetic), “I think I will give Dahc a wonderful treat! I will iron 5 shirts for him! One for every day this week.” And she did. And he seemed pleased. And Nej felt very good about herself and this good thing that she had done. Some time passed. And Nej found herself one night with a lot of time and restless hands. So she thought to herself, “I remember how grateful Dahc seemed last time I ironed shirts for him. I’ll do that again.” However when she told him of her plans, he got a funny look on his face. A funny tentative, strained look and he said, “Um. Maybe I could give you some tips….”
I think that this is the point in the story where you are shaking your head and thinking….NO DAHC, DON’T OFFER HER TIPS!!!!
And Nej pursed her lips in that way which probably made Dahc think, “Good heavenly father, what have I done?”
And she said very quietly, “I don’t think I’m in the mood to iron shirts anymore.”
And for three years after, Nej did not iron any shirts.
Don’t be sad though, because some good has come of this. Dahc irons his own shirts mostly and he is happy with how they come out. Also, Nej can sometimes get her shirts ironed if she leaves them on the ironing board when she suspects Dahc might be about to iron one of his things. And, of course, he does a Level 4+ job.
She suspects that, due to his realization of his mistake, Dahc continues to do her these small ironing jobs out of some residual guilt. However, after reading this blog….he might not feel he owes her any more ironing jobs.
Love you both, Nej and Dahc.
I have a co-worker and friend, whom I will give the pseudonym Nej. And she has a husband, Dahc, who is the topic of many conversations when Nej and I go running together. Of course, Kram is equally a topic of conversation at these times, but today, it happened to be Dahc we talked about. And she divulged a few secrets (it’s okay, Dahc, breathe) that were comforting to say the least.
(Now, don’t worry Dahc, I have cleverly disguised your identity so as to protect your privacy.)
Why were these secrets comforting? Well, there’s a rumour going around that Dahc is a perfect husband. Yes, Nej will be the first to admit that she is often astounded to have won such a superb prize of a mate. Not only is he a lean-mean running machine, he’s a great father and has a very sensible grasp of finances (good thing, because he’s an accountant) and Nej appreciates all these things. However, today I learned two (I hesitate to call them flaws) imperfections that just make him wonderful in that Ikea-As-Is sort of way. Flaw #1: Dahc does not love doing laundry. Apparently he sometimes forgets which settings to use on the washing machine (a difficulty I’m sure we’ve all faced from time to time). Flaw #2: He’s very good at ironing. Ah ha! I know what you’re thinking. But it IS a flaw, and he will realize that next time I have a pile of wrinkly shirts and he discovers them in his basement on the ironing board, waiting quietly and patiently for his skilled hands.
The aforementioned Flaw#2 has, in fact, gotten him into some hot water at one point many years ago (at the tender young age of 23 – how can any of us be judged for what we did at 23?). It was during a busy time in the Nej-Dahc household. And Nej thought to herself (she was also very young and idealistic and energetic), “I think I will give Dahc a wonderful treat! I will iron 5 shirts for him! One for every day this week.” And she did. And he seemed pleased. And Nej felt very good about herself and this good thing that she had done. Some time passed. And Nej found herself one night with a lot of time and restless hands. So she thought to herself, “I remember how grateful Dahc seemed last time I ironed shirts for him. I’ll do that again.” However when she told him of her plans, he got a funny look on his face. A funny tentative, strained look and he said, “Um. Maybe I could give you some tips….”
I think that this is the point in the story where you are shaking your head and thinking….NO DAHC, DON’T OFFER HER TIPS!!!!
And Nej pursed her lips in that way which probably made Dahc think, “Good heavenly father, what have I done?”
And she said very quietly, “I don’t think I’m in the mood to iron shirts anymore.”
And for three years after, Nej did not iron any shirts.
Don’t be sad though, because some good has come of this. Dahc irons his own shirts mostly and he is happy with how they come out. Also, Nej can sometimes get her shirts ironed if she leaves them on the ironing board when she suspects Dahc might be about to iron one of his things. And, of course, he does a Level 4+ job.
She suspects that, due to his realization of his mistake, Dahc continues to do her these small ironing jobs out of some residual guilt. However, after reading this blog….he might not feel he owes her any more ironing jobs.
Love you both, Nej and Dahc.
1 comment:
having read this twice now, i am extremely pleased with the result of what i understand to be the first blog about me. well done.
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